The Journal of Thunderwrath (Tie-in to my comic)

[AT_korvus]

Note:

This series is meant to accompany my intended comic about the DoTA universe. I'm still looking for an artist, since I'm horrible at graphic art, and I might never be able to complete the comic, so in order to give you a little heads up about the contents of this thread, a little background about the comic is in order.

The comic is set in the 6.59 universe, which means that changes made in 6.6 are, for the most part, not canon to the series. However, various additions in 6.6 are relevant to this comic, and any appearance of a 6.6 element should be treated as intended. The only major changes not implemented from the 6.6 series are the new taverns, ie. there will be no neutral tavern, and Enigma still being a part of the Sentinel. Various other minor changes are also not part of this series, and most of them are trivial enough not to be mentioned (Eyes in the forest, for example)

The comic is non-humorous in nature, and will revolve around the basic Good vs Evil theme of DoTA. Furthermore, this comic and associated content will deal in a very "black and white" context, with minor shades of grey. The protagonist in the comic book (and this thread) is Purist Thunderwrath, the Omniknight. His portrayal, at least as intended, is a little (or rather, very) different from how he is perceived in these forums (the term "gaylord" springs to mind). Also, the characters retain their powers from DoTA (with certain exceptions), and the items have been muted, to the extent that a character will only carry a certain set of items in a certain slot. This means that a two-handed character will NOT carry a Claymore, a Mithril Hammer and a Broadsword simultaneously. In other words, real word dynamics apply to items and slots. The working of certain items has been changed, albeit in not so fundamental a way, but have changed nonetheless (Aegis does not go back to Roshan, for instance, but decays after a day and a half). Also, Characters once dead, remain dead (with the exception of Skeleton King and anyone carrying Aegis). Also, with respect to the rule about real world dynamics of items and slots, boots are treated as a pair of boots.

I have also added a lot of names and other characteristics to the DoTA map (eg: Carver in this instance refers to Scourge Mid 1st tower), and I am hoping to create an image file pointing out these names etc soon, so as to help the reader.

With this little introduction behind us, I present an entry from the Journal of Thunderwrath. These entries are non-linear in nature, yet talk about the same conflict. Purist is our narrator in these entries, and refers to his friends and allies with names that are not canon to DoTA, but are easy enough to figure out, given the War3 context of DoTA itself (demon-slayer Magina, for instance). Now, read on...


----


My sight was dimmed as false night came,
The hunter with his crooked smile,
The monstrous corpse of flesh and bile,
And courageous Crestfallen's slender frame,
in horror, mere flesh and bones became,
another victim to the Lich's guile.

That sacred day that Carver fell,
its foundations torn by the Druid's claws,
a roar of joy as Icecrown draws,
closer, though they dearly sell,
their lives, these monsters of hell,
to the druid and his gaping jaws.

The day began with Avernus' King,
as he matched blades with the demon-slayer,
while his magicks twisted my maiden fair,
and brought with him her poisonous sting,
and her spiders-spawn in a shielding ring,
and brought with her her webs o'despair.

The spider queen rushed in her zeal,
crippling a treant with her bite,
she let her peril out of sight,
as my lady in ice did her seal,
numbed, the queen could no more feel,
as my hammer ended her unholy plight.

Blessing my maiden with my holy light,
I rushed to embattled Magina's aid,
weakened and slowed by that runic blade,
my comrade held on with Utherean might,
and in desperation I called my guardian sprite,
buying him bare time to fade.

How sweet, The Avernus Lord's howl of rage,
His victim denied, he turned his steed,
his skeleton horse of a hellish breed,
and charged to me across our stage,
as I turned over another bloodstained page,
in my sacred book that had me freed.

And took my stance to face the crash,
Of his unholy vampiric blade Frostmourne,
And Uther's blessed hammer of stone,
But he halted as he saw in a flash,
of sunlight, the Windrunner rash,
taking aim at his steed of bone.

She greeted him as befits a king,
curtsying like a court-maiden sly,
she'd shot already with her eye,
with a smile she let loose the string,
and Abaddon last heard her arrow sing,
as the wind-maiden bade him goodbye.

The hell-steed crashed and threw him off,
my love brought down hailstorm and sleet,
as the evil king fell at my feet,
near death nearly dead, did he scoff
at redemption I offered, instead of,
the sure end that comes of defeat.

Struggling to his knees he grinned,
and stood up straight as a noble lord,
not a wraith from a Northrendian fjord,
spat blood, and in return for his sin,
asked a boon, to be burned like his kin,
and asked to be burned with his unhloy sword.

I promised my honour and the wraith then spake,
"Give me the end I deserve,
death glorious, for the true god I serve,
across the glaciers and the frozen lake,
guarded by the ghost of the mighty drake"
I nodded and made my hammer's curve.

The charge was sounded once again,
as our warriors rushed the frightful spire,
Abaddon’s fall did thus inspire,
strangely more than our comrades slain,
that trio of hob-gobs, brave and insane,
caught in their own alchemical fire.

Yet their sacrifice was dearly bought,
for the scourge lost two of their own,
the haunting spectre, the dread mage of bone,
a fearful slaughter they had sought,
but their cruelty was soon brought to naught,
as the reckless trio had dashed alone.

Now Carver’s way was laid bare,
as the Druid and his companion charged,
ahead of us, a formidable vanguard,
and hewed at the stones without a care,
for the spells and arrows that filled the air,
from the depths of the forest that was forever scarred.

And charging from the dark path they came,
The dark Dranei from a world of blight,
the ghostly Wyvern with his dreadful flight,
but to the druid they were all the same,
more mortal flesh to hew and main,
and he roared and charged as I cast the light.

Healing his wounds as for the battle ahead,
For the Dranei had cast his magical shell,
but before he could cast another spell,
fierce, gaping jaws tore off his head,
and the Wyvern could barely scream in dread,
before with a swipe, he too had fell.

The druid’s familiar had meanwhile,
gnawed steadily at Carver’s walls,
aided by our two warrior trolls,
who’d feast on ghoulish flesh so vile,
and the bathed with glee in their acrid bile,
and chilled hearts with their berserker calls.

Unheeding his wounds he rampaged,
his battle axes chopping the stone,
easily as if it was wood or bare bone,
the warlord had left us amazed,
as much as his companion crazed,
the sacred warrior with his son to mourn.

Together, druid, bear and troll,
with axe, spear, claw and fang,
shaking with bloodlust they sang,
until no more could the foundations stall,
the inevitability of Carver’s fall,
and it came down with a joyous clang.

At once the blighted land did heal,
and the undead warriors halted in shock,
and no more did the foul beings then mock,
our holy and most righteous zeal,
and then did we for the first time feel,
how close was the doom of that icy rock.

With our hearts light with hope again,
we met the oncoming wave halfway,
as the sacred troll began to pray,
to his dark gods, he had brought no shame,
and his spears again set the enemy aflame,
and his holy fire burnt as bright as the day.

But alas, we rushed in a trap most foul,
as a demon summoned the malicious pit,
and the ground with hellish fires was lit,
and the hunter hid the sun with a scowl,
and the woods echoed with a blood curdling howl,
and before we moved, Huskar’s head was split.

By the great cleaver that the Pit Lord held,
and the wolf and hunter killed with glee,
for the spikes meant we could not flee,
and the scourge raised the weapons they held,
in joy, they’d avenge those we’d felled,
and I froze as the butcher’s hook came for me.

Wouldst that I was the one to be taken,
and not that fair figure in the azure cape,
I thrice cursed Davion, that blundering ape,
as I watched in shock, my spirit shaken,
my sacrifice she became, my crystal maiden,
as she used the dagger meant for escape.

----

[Sandata]

haha, rather enjoyed that. Can't wait for the comic though. I have a feeling you like the epic comic feel of the 80's. Keep at it.

[AT_korvus]

Originally Posted by Sandata

haha, rather enjoyed that. Can't wait for the comic though. I have a feeling you like the epic comic feel of the 80's. Keep at it.

Thanks man, I've posted the complete entry now, which chronicles the death of Rylai and some of the other heroes (including a double kill by techies )

And getting the comic done will be a pain, because I'm not that good an artist, and need someone with a little experience/spare time. And ya, I'm aiming for a goth/fantasy feel to the whole thing, kinda like Conan.

Here is a concept art of a Ziggurat that I made, as an example of the dark look that I want the comic and the content of this thread to have:



Will post more entries soon (including a possible gank at Roshan )

[AT_korvus]

<Part of the script for the comic>


Setting:

A battle near Steelbark (Sent-bot first tower)

Story: Assault on Steelbark by Scourge forces, led by Pit Lord and Lich. Defenders led by Cairn and Bradwarden

Page 1:

Panel Structure: 9 panels 3x3

Panel flow:

1-2-3
4-5-6
7-8-9


Panel 1

Shot composition: Time of day is the twilight, and hence everything is a little dark. Scene facing north, towards the scourge lane. Steelbark in background, towards the right, at medium health, and so, a few fires. Being tended by wisps. A hint of mist in the trees, with skies a bit overcast. The light from Carapace (Scourge bot first tower) visible in the background, but the rest of the tower is swathed in mists.


Panel 2

Shot composition: close up of Bradwarden's axe, with Bradwarden checking the edge with his thumb. Showing just the axe and his arms. The head of the axe has an ornamental spike which looks a lot like a Tauren's horn.

Panel 3:

Shot Composition: Setting is a rocky valley in the Barrens. Red mountains in the far background, Mid-day sun and no clouds in a blue sky. A centaur chieftain with a necklace of horns and with his hoofs in the air (almost like the loading screen from ver 6.5), attacking a Tauren chieftain carrying a totem and a poleaxe, who parries the blow with his own axe. A battle between Centaurs and Taurens in the background.

Panel 4:

Shot Composition: Same battle, same scene from a side angle, the centaur chieftain forcing the Tauren to his knee, both of them with their teeth grit. A voice whispers "Warchief"

Panel 5:

Shot Composition: Same side angle, the Tauren pushes back the Centaur and rises up. The Centaur loses his balance.

Panel 6:

Shot Composition: Almost top view, the Centaur is on the ground, reaching for his axe (same axe as Bradwarden's), and there is a shadow of the Tauren raising his totem pole. The voice says "Warchief", but louder.

Panel 7:

Shot Composition: Close up of the Centaur's face and arms, holding up his axe defensively, eyes wide, teeth grit and a little blood dripping from his mouth. Totally covered by the shadow of the Tauren. The voice says "Warchief" loudly.


Panel 8:

Shot Composition: Facing NW, with Steelbark and trees in the background, along with a cloudy sky. A little bit of mist over the trees and on the ground. Bradwarden in foreground, holding the axe, a little shocked. We can a piece of skin tied in the middle of the haft, holding the axe together. Behind him is a Druid of the Talon, raising his free arm towards Bradwarden in concern. A few treants behind him, and the wisps continue their work on Steelbark.

Druid: Warchief, whats the matter? Is everything alright?


Panel 9:

Shot Composition: Facing SE, 180 degrees from the previous shot, with the Druid's helmet in the foreground. In the mid-distance, Bradwarden turns in surprise to face the Druid, holding the axe. Misty trees in the background. His eyes seem a little afraid.


Page 2:

Panel structure: 9 panels 3x3

Panel flow:

1-2-3
4-5-6
7-8-9


Panel 1

Shot Composition: nearly the same as the last panel from the previous page. Bradwarden is a little younger, and is holding an obviously different axe. There is blood on the blade and his hands. The background has a Tauren reeling from a flesh wound Bradwarden has inflicted on him.

Panel 2

Shot Composition: Bradwarden screams and rushes towards the Tauren who killed the previous Centaur chief. Bradwarden's back in the foreground and he rushes with his axe raised. The Tauren does not appear to notice. In the background, his back is turned and the fallen Centaur is lying at his feet.

Panel 3

Shot Composition: Closeup of the Tauren as he turns slightly. It is Cairne. The close up shows only his back, his head and his weapons in his hands.

Panel 4

Shot Composition: Steelbark again. View is from SW to NE. The top of the goblin shops can be made out from within the mists in the background. There is another druid shouting orders at some treants. In the foreground, Bradwarden is stooped and wiping his brow and clutching at his axe. The druid stands by his side.

Bradwarden: Nothing, just memories of a battle I'd forgotten.
Druid: Oh... a battle against the scourge? I was told you'd fought on many fronts against them.

Panel 5

Shot Composition: Same as last time, treants forming lines and the druid in the background pointing towards Carapace. Mists have completely hidden the goblin shops. In the foreground, the druid is in the same position, while Bradwarden is standing erect and looking at his axe, which he is cradling with both hands, shaft in one and haft in the other.

Bradwarden: What? The Scourge? Oh no, nothing so noble. We were fighting a different enemy... a battle for blood and food and water, nothing as noble as fighting the scourge.
Druid: Oh... I... don't think...

Panel 6

Shot Composition: Same as before. Treants in a line as the druid in the background talks to a wisp. Bradwarden looking at the sky, still cradling the axe, and the druid is a little uneasy.

Bradwarden: You don't think you've heard this one? Oh, everyone has. No one wants to admit it though. The desert is a harsh place after all...

Panel 7

Shot Composition: The battle in the Barrens. Side view of Cairn on the left with his knees bent and swinging his poleaxe, and Bradwarden on the right, his hoofs and axe raised in the classic Centaur attack pose. The body is still at Cairn's feet, and the ground is turning red as the sun sets behind them.

Bradwarden's voiceover: And in such a place, sometimes, the only excuse you need to kill is the killing itself.

Panel 8

Shot Composition: Bradwarden is brought to the ground as the poleaxe connects with his torso. Foreground has the back of Cairn swinging his poleaxe, and Bradwarden in obvious pain as his axe falls from his hands. Another Tauren (Raigor?) has appeared just behind Bradwarden and is raising his totem. The new Tauren's eyes are red.

Bradwarden's voiceover: Of course you killed for so called honour and food, and you also killed for pleasure

Panel 9

Shot Composition: A Tauren grappling with a Centaur, as an Orc on the Centaur's back raises his axe to chop off the Centaur's head. The Centaur's eyes are wide with terror, while the eyes of the Tauren and the Orc are red. The Orc's fangs are bared and there is blood on his face and hands. He is wearing standard grunt armour, but has a rather large axe.

Bradwarden's voiceover: Do you know, I've killed a lot? I've killed of nearly every species and every tribe I have come across. My father called me rash and hotheaded. He was proud of me.


Page 3:

Panel structure: 9 panels 3x3

Panel flow:

1-2-3
4-5-6
7-8-9


Panel 1

Shot composition: A silhouette of a Centaur against the skyline of the Barrens, his chest pierced by a spear, and his axe dropping out of his hands. The spear came from the back as the Centaur was trying to run.

Bradwarden's voiceover: My father was one of the strongest chiefs our tribe had ever seen.

Panel 2:

Shot composition: A troll berserker kneeling over a dead Centaur, partly showing a Tauren and an Orc from the torso down. Backdrop is still the Barrens, and the ground is redder because of the blood.

Bradwarden's voiceover: We had defeated all of our enemies under his rule. None of them could withstand our onslaught.

Panel 3:

Shot composition: Raigor(?) to the left and Bradwarden to the right. Cairn's figure is visible in the background. Raigor(?) smashes down his totem, which Bradwarden holds back. The stress is clearly visible on Bradwarden's face and body, but Raigor is pushing him down effortlessly and his eyes are still red.

Bradwarden's voiceover: We hunted the Tauren for sport. We would play with one for hours before we killed.

Panel 4:

Shot composition: An unarmed Orc grunt with red eyes barrels into Bradwarden, attempting to unbalance him. The grunt comes in from the right, and strikes Bradwarden with force. Raigor(?) is presented as a silhouette, showing just his red eyes, while the impact makes Bradwarden loose his footing, as he looks in surprise and shock at the Orc.


Bradwarden's voiceover: We killed for fun. Sometimes, three or four of us would get together for a hunt.

Panel 5

Shot composition: POV of Bradwarden, lying on the ground, looking up. Raigor(?) stands on one side, grinning and with red eyes, while the orc stands on the other side, massaging his shoulder, with his eyes closed.


Bradwarden's voiceover: And oh, the sport we'd make...

Panel 6

Shot composition: Same as before, the Orc bending over Bradwarden, fangs out, glaring eyes red. His fist is clenched as he is about to hit Bradwarden, Raigor has leaned in too, in order to get a better look.

Bradwarden's voiceover: Sometimes, we'd kill with bare fists.


Panel 7

Shot Composition: POV of the grunt. Bradwarden's bloodied face as one hand holds him and the other readies for another punch. Also, the entire panel is as if it was seen through a red haze.

Bradwarden's voiceover: We were never afraid to get our hands dirty. Someone else's blood on your hands... you never know how powerful that feeling is unless you've had your enemy's blood dripping down your bare fists.

Panel 8

Shot composition: POV of Bradwarden. He is lying on the ground, and his face is turned to one side. Part of the grunt's boot is visible, as is some of his own blood. Cairne is standing in mid distance amidst a few dead centaurs, holding his poleaxe. Silhouettes of a few Orcs, Trolls and Tauren are in the background.


Bradwarden's voiceover: And when our quarry was a Tauren... well, you have to understand, they were our blood enemies, so when our quarry was a Tauren...

Panel 9

Shot composition: Close up of Cairn, blood on his face, and his eyes red, though emotionless.

Bradwarden's voiceover:We showed them no mercy.


<updated 3rd page, next page by soon>

[AT_korvus]

A work in progress map of the comic, mentioning Tower names and geographical features as a reference



EDIT: Yes, there are a few typos.

[madeener]

Why is it all the world's saloons are concentrated in one area?

[AT_korvus]

Originally Posted by madeener

Why is it all the world's saloons are concentrated in one area?

eh? Wut?

[Francis]

~OOH! I like the names you used on your map, such as the tower names and map areas. Cool.

[AT_korvus]

Thanks, wanted to make the entire map seem bigger, and thought that the best way to go about it would be to "blow up" the proportions by making even smaller things bigger. So now, those two sentinel creep camps that a person could cross in under a minute have become an entire wood that takes a journey of half a day

Case in point, the entire battle as given in the poem takes place near Carver, and the gank happens on the juke point just behind it, and not on the gank spot near Magerend.

Also, some of these names are tributes to certain other literary works as well (there is a very strong Tolkienian element in the names of the final towers on both sides )

[madeener]

On the top-left of chartered world. Is there some beer festival going on?

[AT_korvus]

Originally Posted by madeener

On the top-left of chartered world. Is there some beer festival going on?

Heh, originally, I was gonna change it to a pic with the taverns removed, but you've just given me a nice idea Thanks