[Agi - Sent] Wyrmsbane, The Dwarven Archer

[barnii]

Hey! All right, first hero. Since HoN went retail and i don't have 30 simoleons at hand, i figured, what the heck. I got time.

This hero was meant to be suggested as a HoN hero, btw. But the programmers would prolly be able to fit it in DotA as well

Okay, here goes.


The Backstory:

(please don't laugh at the disturbing woman. i'm still looking for a female dwarf icon)


Wyrmsbane, The Dwarven Archer

Few dwarves ever excel at marksmanship, for their height limits their sight range and their bodies lack the reach to pull a bow to its extent. As such, they prefer to throw axes. However, for every race there is someone who defies the natural order of things. Long is the war between dragons and dwarves, and the dragons have always had the upper hand. But the dragon race has met its match, for an unusual mix of marksmanship and magic embodied by Wyrmsbane has emerged. And with the dispute between the Sentinel and the Scourge starting to heat up, they too will find that a dwarven archer is not to be trifled with.


Str: 15 (+1.9)
Agi: 23 (+2.3)
Int: 19 (+2.2)


Skills:




Serpenstone
[Toggle/Enemy Unit]

Wyrmsbane enchants her arrows with Serpentstone, a mysterious element which rapidly grows and constricts the target's most vital organs, dealing 5/6/7/8 magic damage to the target every second for 5/6/7/8 seconds. DoT stacks up to 3 times. (Ex: At level 4, can deal 24 magic damage every second for 8 secs.)

Manacost: 5/8/11/14 per attack
Cooldown: 0 secs at all levels

I hope you have an Arc Reactor.



Earthbound
[Self-position/Enemy Units]

Wyrmsbane fires an arrow into the air which then exactly lands in front of her feet. When the arrow hits the ground, it sends ripples of energy into a 300/400/500/600 area around Wyrmsbane, decreasing caught enemies' movespeed by 20/30/40/50% for 3/3/4/4 secs.

Manacost: 70/80/90/100
Cooldown: 10/13/16/19

Keep your head held high, but your feet firm on the ground.

[Pending Skill Icon]

Sure Footing
[Passive/Orb Effect]

Every so often, Wyrmsbane lets her being connect with the earth around her. This connection enables Wyrmsbane to hit targets with more precision. Grants one charge for every second that Wyrmsbane stays in her position (even while attacking/turning around, so long as she stays in her position) with a maximum of 1/2/3/4 charges. For every charge, grants (charge*10) bonus true damage to her attacks. If Wyrmsbane walks/changes position even ever so slightly, charges reset to 0. Bonus true damage stacks with Heartstopper's and Wyrmonger's damage.

I'll move if you give me a coin.



Wyrmonger
[Channeling/Enemy Unit]

Taking time to adjust her sight and breathing, Wyrmsbane fires her infamous Mythril Arrow towards a target enemy. Channels for 3/4/5 seconds and deals 150 magic damage for every second channeled. Must keep sight of target to maintain channeling. If the vision of the target is lost during channeling, the skill will automatically fire, damage being the number of seconds channeled before vision was lost. Range of 1000.

Manacost: 150/200/250
Cooldown: 50 secs at all levels

Draw arrow, load arrow, cock bowstring, aim, inhale, exhale, inhale, FIRE!


Sidenotes:

-This hero was meant to be a ganker/initiator.
-Dagger would be a nice item for her.
-The basic combo would be Wyrmonger-Blink-Earthbound-Serpentstone.
-The hero is a female dwarf.
-Her husband is Kardel. Zing!
-I can haz a cookie?
-^ no, seriously.


props for GreyArchon, Peekay, and Arcsol for the icons. Check them out at The Hive Workshop - The Warcraft 3 Modding Site.

[barnii]

Saved for future posts.

[Averrios]

Oh my god ... worst theme I've ever seen ... a dwarv archer?! are you fucking serious? Dwarves would never shoot with arrows ... see the dwarv sniper or the mortas... you see: ARCHER + DWARV = Bullshit

I'm not a hater but I have to say that this could never fit into DotA ... Change theme and make a better presentation(reading is not fun) I'll have a review then.

[barnii]

Ok, i'll think of a new model.

But if you read the backstory, it's explained there why she is the only dwarven archer. Plus, The Chronicles of Narnia contains dwarven archers. You can even see a few of them in the Prince Caspian movie. So, yeah.

[LightburneR]

Originally Posted by Averrios

Oh my god ... worst theme I've ever seen ... a dwarv archer?! are you fucking serious? Dwarves would never shoot with arrows ... see the dwarv sniper or the mortas... you see: ARCHER + DWARV = Bullshit

I'm not a hater but I have to say that this could never fit into DotA ... Change theme and make a better presentation(reading is not fun) I'll have a review then.

The theme isn't that good, but that's no reason to hold your comments. A hero that could never fit into DotA would be those thematic suggestions with completely impractical or totally abusable skills that I see in these forums. (not all)

1st Skill: I see an attempt to steal Huskar's Burning Spear. Does-not-like.

2nd Skill: Increasing Cooldown? No wait. What? Numbers are completely off. Tweak is nessesary.

3rd Skill: Bonus damage for no moving is a no-no. No matter how good an idea this is on paper, this will never ever work out in-game.

Ultimate: Now you're stealing from Kardel. (Dwarven Sniper) There are minor differences, but the idea, damage and range are shockingly similar.

Overall: EDIT: Post above the post above me made me post. Not the actual idea.

Theme is important, but not that important. Concept is what counts.

[Averrios]

you could change the word arrow into bullet and everything would be the same so she does not need to be an archer... anyway if there are dwarve archers in narnia WE PLAY DOTA and not Narnia, dude

and to answer the post above me: For me every hero is an individuum if you are a builder you would not start cooking xD so the theme and history and concept should fit together

[LightburneR]

Originally Posted by Averrios

and to answer the post above me: For me every hero is an individuum if you are a builder you would not start cooking xD so the theme and history and concept should fit together

Hm, what?

It sickens me that people pay more attention and give points to the story, model, descriptions and whatever flashy icons are posted instead of the actual idea itself.

This is a forum for Hero Ideas; Not for up-and-coming literary talents such as yourself.

If you wish to continue this, PM me. Do not spam up this thread with an off-topic arguement.

Regardless, you might want to post your actual review that would help this hero get better, conceptually, instead of discussing on what model/missile art/icon/description/story/theme the hero should have.

Once again, this is not the art section nor is it the literature section.

[SpiderPig]

t -down

[barnii]

Alright. I see my problems.

It does seem a lot like kardel. But I never meant it to be that way. And i didn't notice the increasing cooldowns.

Anyway, there's still room for improvement.

And for the record, we definitely are NOT playing narnia. I didn't say so. I was only making a point that dwarven archers DO exist and that I didn't make it up. Sometimes we need to go beyond the usual norms and try other stuff we don't see everyday.


But yes, the skills are still messed up.

[JustKillThem]

Your crazy men.Shitlike somebody his brain.DD

[Sturkyn]

Interesting stories are always worth reviewing. Do not fear the strange!

But to be honest i personally dont support Out-of-Warcraft Icons and hero types.

Still give him rest, he tried to do something, dont need to discourage this much.

@Barnii, keep on working mate and try to use Saguine's Hero Maker next time.

Here is the link!

[Wrooks]

I like your hero.... maybe change a few skills.... Definitely keep the ultimate thats a keeper... as for your other 3 skills not so sure.. Also sturkyn has a point non warcraft models will have a harder time getting into the game. and hopefully this will change when Dota 2 comes out but for now we have to just go with what we have.

There is a centaur archer and a mortor team so maybe switch to those models...

also your hero doesn't seem to play like sniper in my opinion ... there are slight similiarities if you cut the skills down to the very basic level but there are too many differences for it to be similar.

Also what happens if your in the middle of your mithril shot and you get stunned? Go invis? Activate an item? will it still fire, will it cancel? The owl skill was taken from treant so maybe give it to your hero so they can keep vision on the enemy.

[deathkidkun]

Theme, a good lore along with great names and flashy icons only plays the part of attracting the hero. It may be a bit important to create certain skills, but all in all it isn't the requirement needed for a great hero.
It all comes down to creativity and balance, not just skill-wise but stats-wise as well. Some people don't even consider the mana cost and cooldown for their own skills regarding it's abusability when looking at the mana pool. Best way to do so is check the current heroes on Dota for reference on the manacost and cooldown.
Anyways, regarding this hero, I've not much time to say stuff now cause of things to do. I'll come back later to get a better look at her.